I was lying down on the floor in the living room when Dhvani came running to me. Taking the girls to the beach had been super fun but carrying them in arms once they were exhausted had taken a toll on my neck and the back. Girls are all grown up and it’s pretty tough now to lift them in arms and walk few yards.
“Mumma! what happened to you?” Dhvani asked me with a concerned look on her face and a heavy voice.
The innocence on her face melted my heart.
“I am a little tired and taking rest some rest,” I told her.
My answer wasn’t convincing enough for her so she stood still with the same expressions on her face.
“Dhvani! Where are you? Come fast! I have made a beautiful castle,” came Avani’s voice from the kid’s room.
Before Dhvani came to me, she was playing kinetic sand with her sister and I was cashing out on that opportunity to lie down in peace.
Failing a quick response from Dhvani, Avani stormed into the living room. To her shock as well, Mumma was lying down which meant something wasn’t normal.
“Mumma, are you okay?” asked Avani sitting beside me trying to reach out for my hand.
“I am just taking little rest. You both go and play with your kinetic sand,” I told her. The girls didn’t move an inch.
“Is there a pain in your back?” asked Dhvani again. “Can I help you?”
Even before I could say anything, she started pressing my shoulders with her tiny hands. Avani was quick enough to move her fingers over my forehead and eyes. Those soft little hands all over my face felt surreal.
It took me a while to convince both of them that I was absolutely fine and make them resume their play. Those ten minutes made me witness the most innocent form of love and care. The kind that only a child can offer her parents. Such effortless expression of love.
This got me thinking about how important was the expression of love and care to your parents at every age. This summer I was at my brother’s place with my Mom and Dad. And all I did was just relax, eat, and gain all those pounds back that I had managed to lose in the last two months at the gym. I was living with the agenda of chilling in every way possible. I was relaxed from the kids’ side also since they were in secure hands and all their requirements — feeding, bathing, sleeping, playing — was taken care of by my folks. This golden opportunity comes only once a year.
I decided I would take myself to the old phase when I was single and independent and the only thing I used to do on weekends and after the office was to sleep for countless hours, followed by shopping and eating out.
So there I was. My day would start around 9-10, with no schedule. I was doing things at my own convenience which left my Mom puzzled and irritated.
“This is not the way you should behave. You have two kids to look after. You should follow a routine. Act responsibly.” she would go on. “You look clumsy, comb your hair, etc. etc.”
“You’re there to take care of the kids, na? So spare me for some time,” I would tell her with a smile. I knew she was concerned and she too wanted me to relax but in a proper way. But I was giving her the College girl vibe, enjoying all the pampering she was giving me. This is how I am with my Mom. I take her for granted all the time without any guilt. I do it because I know she doesn’t judge me. She was just concerned.
As my summer vacation ended and while I was leaving back for Bangalore, the feeling was that the time I had spent was too less. The guilt came rushing back that I irritated my Mom a lot and didn’t express my love and care as much as I should have.
Then another voice in my head consoled me, “It’s okay. Your Mom knows that you do care for her.”
But I strongly feel that no matter how grown up you are, expressing love and care for your parents is super important. At every age, the feeling that a parent gets from the love and care received by his/her child is surreal only.
My method of expression of my love and care is different. I am not vocal most of the time. But I realize it’s important to put it in words. That has another level of healing.
As we grow up, we stop expressing especially to our parents, fearing it would expose the vulnerable side of us. At my place when I show the emotional side of myself to my parents, they feel I am going through some emotional turmoil or issues at some other front of life. It could arouse suspicion in their mind because they know that I usually don’t tell my problems to them thinking it would worry them.
But like I said, pouring out your feelings to words with your parents, your kids, your spouse, or for that matter, any of your loved ones, will add bliss to their lives. It would give them the taste of innocence of your love.
The way my girls make me feel, my parents deserve the same love from their child.
A child can never grow too old to hug her parents and say, “I love you, Mom. I love you, Papa.”
As always, thanks for reading!